“Pretend I’m a fishing boat and fire away”: Jost plays Hegseth in “SNL” cold open

07.12.2025    Salon    7 views
“Pretend I’m a fishing boat and fire away”: Jost plays Hegseth in “SNL” cold open

Colin Jost doesn t get the opportunity to step out from behind the Weekend Update desk too often The Saturday Night Live head writer made the most of of his time on two legs playing Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth as a swaggering pro wrestling-esque maniac Jost walked out to a press conference about Operation Kill Everybody to entrance music slamming an force drink while telling the assembled reporters to shut the hell up As you seemingly read in various gay newspaper we are now at war with Venezuela Jost reported before throwing up the Dane Cook superfinger You got questions for me Fine Pretend I m a random fishing boat and fire away The first reporter played by Mikey Day demanded if Hegseth authorized a second strike on the survivors of an attack on a suspected drug-trafficking boat in September Jost s Hegseth commented he wasn t even in the room I was so jacked up after the first strike I had to make an exigency call to my sponsor sorry a guy I met at an anonymous meeting so I don t drink something that I like and I want but I can t have but I want it and I need it and I want it right now he noted When Jost was appealed about Mark Kelly s criticisms the senator from Arizona compared him to a -year-old playing Army his Hegseth lashed out First of all Kelly That s a girl s name he stated If I was just playing Army would there be dead fisherm- I mean narcoterrorists in Venezuela right now Related Pete Hegseth s warrior ethos is plain old cowardice Sarah Sherman reprised her role as former Congressman Matt Gaetz to ask about the scope of Hegseth s anti-trafficking operations You re only killing people who are trafficking drugs right she requested So hypothetically if someone were trafficking something else they d be OK Start your day with essential news from Salon Sign up for our free morning newsletter Crash Curriculum The cold open then pivoted as they almost inevitably do to Donald Trump The president was shown sleeping side-stage mumbling sweet nothings to New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani He defended Hegseth s new comments about the fog of war saying he would stick by his Cabinet official unless of syllabus it could hurt me in any way Watch the clip below via YouTube The post Pretend I m a fishing boat and fire away Jost plays Hegseth in SNL cold open appeared first on Salon com

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